Forgiveness And Trust Are Two Different Things
James 5:16 16 Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.
Why is it so difficult to rebuild trust with someone who hurt you?
Forgiving someone doesn’t mean we make ourselves a doormat or that we blindly trust that person we forgave. Forgiveness can take place instantly, but trust will take some time. Is there someone you are unwilling or unable to forgive? Our emotional and relational wounds can so deeply affect us that we want revenge, and we are willing to hurt others because of our own wounds. This cycle of unforgiveness is destructive to both parties.
Forgiveness doesn’t always mean you can go back to the way things were, but it does mean you can have the right heart towards the person who sinned against you, so there is a possibility of restoration. Forgiveness is given while trust is earned over time. Full restoration requires both parties responding to the Lord over time. Forgiveness is not resuming a relationship without changes, and it’s not forgetting what happened. Sin always has a cost, and there is always a cost to forgiveness. That’s why it’s important to understand what forgiveness is not, so we can know and experience what forgiveness really is.
Romans 12:17-19 17 Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. 18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. 19 Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord.
We can’t change other people’s minds and hearts, but we can forgive people as Christ forgave us. That means that we need to forgive them, even if they don’t deserve it. When we forgive, we are free from the bondage of an unforgiving spirit, but full restoration of a broken relationship takes time to rebuild trust.
What is the Holy Spirit saying to you through these scriptures?